Purpose from the Heart

From a Dear Reader:
I have been trying to remember some of the things you said in reference to my state of mind or should I say heart....... would you be willing to write the essence of what you said? It was really good and want to chew on it ....the full essence of it
Very grateful for you and your willingness to share and help a fellow journeyer --
I so enjoy your spirit and heart.

We get so confused about this idea of “coming from heart”. Because our mind has been in charge for so long, we really have no idea what it means to come from heart.

So, let’s go about this a different way. Rather than figuring out (a favorite mind function) what to do and how to do it and so on, let’s just drop right into the body. What does that mean?
Stop.
Just notice, for this moment, the feeling of the breath. Your breath. In and out. How that feels. Notice – how the mind kicks in. Just notice that. And, just for this moment decide that – just for this moment – you’re going to just notice the breath. And how that feels. Decide that the mind can wait. For a moment.
Breathe.

We hear these words so often. So many spiritual teachers tell us to do this.
But then – then – the mind gets busy.
Trying to figure it out.

This is exactly the malady that ails us. And we are so used to this, we don’t recognize it for what it is.

To rest quietly in that place inside of us – by whatever name we call it or no name at all – that place that is quiet, this is the challenge, the answer and the solution.

To be quiet enough that we can notice – really notice – our breath. In and out. Try this for five consecutive breaths.

That which arises next – and it may be irritation, it may be anxiety, it may be impatience – this is what we need to notice is aggravating our situation. THIS is the culprit, itself. It tries to convince us that it arises “because of” – this that or the other – situation, person, lack. But IT – itself is the problem. The sensation we’ve grown so accustomed to that we live our lives finding excuses for it.

In our longing to find our sense of Purpose – that for which we are living – what we most need, more than anything is to let go of all that gets in the way. In the way of just LIVING. Here’s the thing: it is exactly impossible NOT to live our Purpose when we do this. Because our Purpose does not show up as a banner in the sky. It creeps in. On the undulating surface of the waves of our lives. In this moment and this one and this one. What presents itself to be done. What needs response. What we need to attend to. Here.

This IS our Purpose. Make no mistake about it – if we began a big mission with full intent of purpose and do not rest deeply in each moment of its accomplishment it will feel no different in its level of aggravation than the life we’re living now – the life in which we are not in full attendance.

That is the misery. Not being fully, deeply dedicated to this life we are in. The one that greets us each morning when we wake up. The one we pull up our boots and get dressed up for.

This is the life we have to do “our thing” within. And the sandbox we have is the one we open our eyes to – every single day.

This is not to say we can’t change the sandbox. We can. But believe me – there is no single place – no single sandbox with its new shiny toys that will entertain us for long until we get right down into the fullness and juiciness of it.

So that is our practice. Attending to what is in front of us to do. Now.

That man who is driving us crazy. That job that is killing us with boredom. All of it. Attend to it. Ask yourself: “In relation to this – what is the kindest thing I can do? For me, for it, for him, for her?”
And then – do it.
In the doing you will be kind to all of us.

And – you will be fulfilling your Purpose.

Sometimes the discontent we feel is calling us to do something worthwhile. This can be a good thing. If this is true, stop and look around – in your life right now. Who or what that you know or know about could use what you can offer? Often we think “doing something worthwhile” means something BIG. Something different, somewhere different. Something that will make a difference in some sort of a way that is in our mind – “for the world”. This is not where we make a difference. We make a difference here and now where we are, with what we are immediately aware of that needs attention.

It is big enough. It matters, and it matters enough. This is what there is to do. And it is worthwhile.

Sometimes our restlessness means we’re just not happy. If there is something that is truly wrong in our lives, it is incumbent upon us to change it. If what is wrong is that we have a habit of being unhappy – finding fault – with whatever there is, then THAT is what needs to change. Only we can answer that particular question for ourselves, because only we are the Soul in this incarnation having this exact experience.

Our Soul seeks us out. And sometimes in that process we feel the restlessness of knowing that something needs attention. This is good. Be very, very patient with yourself. It is your Heart that needs attention. Kindness.

You do know what to do. Because you are so very able to be Present with the ones with whom you share life. You know how to show up. You know what needs to be done.

Often this work is more challenging for those who are remarkably intelligent. We KNOW we know all this stuff already. So we can get caught in the frustration of: “so why isn’t it working out just yet? I already knew that.”

Translating this into the action of the body – this is the rub and it is just that translation that makes it come alive. Real.

Embodied as the wisdom we DO know. In this breath. Now.

Trusting Ourselves

I had a lovely conversation with a friend recently about “why things happen”. We agreed there is the possibility that things are just random. Stuff happens – and it is our lot to sort out how we’ll respond, given this or that in our lives.

I lean toward thinking that we may have something to do with our lot in life, though. Not in the pejorative way that many of us were taught to believe; ie: roiling with guilt about what we did wrong to bring this craziness into our lives. But rather, that there is a natural trajectory to the things we think, say and do. There are consequences of the sort that to push a ball in one direction is to increase the likelihood it will move in that said direction. There are other parameters to deal with. The slope of the land. Whether the ball is full of air and so on. But still – our action has an influence.

And so it is in our lives – any given tendency toward which we lean is likely to reap some sort of benefit, for better or for worse.

The secret for many of us, laden as we are by the aforementioned guilt, is to unhinge from the self-splattering we can get into in response to the circumstances of our lives. The same lines of reasoning would inform us that to beat ourselves up is to provoke another whole set of circumstances in which we are the victims of our own brutality. And, I notice, that is what often happens.

In our good-hearted search for the lesson to be learned in the conundrums of our lives, we tend to cast blame. “Why did this happen?” is often construed to mean “What did I (or you) do wrong to get this mess?” To dig deeper in the undoing of the maladaptive messages of our own mind is to question that premise at its base. Forget that sort of figuring out.

Ask, instead, “Given this (and this and this), what is the best/kindest/gentlest response I can come up with here?” What I find is that if there is some awakening to be had in terms of that which I may have done to provoke any given situation, it will most likely be revealed in a useful manner under these conditions. A gentle environment in which to come to revelation.

Let that be our goal, then: to be safe enough with our own selves that we dare to reveal that which we most need to see. Plenty will come out of hiding fast enough when we do this. Because we have proven ourselves to be trustworthy where it matters the most: to our very own selves.